🛋️ Umm, Girl… Did You Just Lie to Your Therapist?

Dr. Chantelle Walker
Jun 25
2 min read

Let’s Talk About It. 👀

Lying in therapy. Even just reading that might make you feel a little… called out. Maybe even a bit uncomfortable.

But here’s the truth: it happens. A lot more than we tend to admit. And guess what? It doesn’t make you a bad client or a bad person. It makes you human.

Whether you’ve sugarcoated something, dodged a tough question, or conveniently “forgot” to mention something important, you’re not alone. Many people — even the most therapy-committed folks — find themselves bending the truth in sessions. The reasons vary, but they usually come down to one thing: protection.

Why Do We Lie in Therapy?

There are so many reasons someone might withhold the truth in therapy. A few common ones:

Fear of judgment — “What if they think I’m a terrible person?”
Shame — “I can’t even admit this to myself, let alone someone else.”
Trust still forming — “We’re not there yet.”
Not ready to unpack it — “If I say it out loud, I’ll have to deal with it.”
Wanting to appear “better” — “If I sound like I’ve got it together, maybe I will.”

None of these make you weak or manipulative. They make you someone navigating the very real, very raw terrain of emotional vulnerability.

Here’s the Twist: The Lie Is Often a Clue.

Therapists aren’t in the room to play “gotcha.” We’re not trying to catch you in contradictions or judge your choices. We’re trained to listen between the lines, and sometimes, the fact that something was left unsaid is just as meaningful as what was said.

So, what if instead of shaming yourself for lying or hiding, you got curious about it?

✨ What was I afraid might happen if I told the truth?
✨ What am I trying to protect myself from?
✨ What does this lie say about what I’m still healing from?

These questions don’t just peel back layers — they start the real work.

When You’re Ready, Honesty Becomes a Superpower.

Therapy is a unique space. It’s one of the few places in life where you don’t have to perform, edit, or be “on.” It’s designed for the messy stuff — the contradictions, the shame, the stuckness. And being honest, when you’re finally ready, can feel like taking the first full breath after holding it in for way too long.

But if you’re not ready yet? That’s okay too. Healing isn’t a race. And sometimes, the path forward starts with simply noticing what you’re not ready to say.